To save Carl Hughes the problem of coming up with a reason for not attending the next outing, a list of excuses has been compiled from which he can choose one.
They are as follows:
1) The kids are off school.
2) The kids are in school.
3) My wife has to work.
4) I have to work.
5) It's very sunny out and I might get sunburned.
6) It's raining out and I might get wet.
7) The car won't start.
8) I missed the bus.
9) Trains are unnatural and are the work of the devil.
10) I forgot the date.
11) No one told me the date.
12) I only drink bright blue drinks that come with umbrellas and I'm scared you will tease me about it.
13) I've got an appointment with my doctor/dentist/optician/sex change therapist.
14) I've converted to Islam and drinking is against the teachings of the prophet, I now wish to be known as Mohammad Al Dokiegit.
15) I'm sexually attracted to someone who will be there, and I'm scared if I drink too much I might admit it to him.
16) I'm shy.
17) I'm only allowed out of my gimp suit to go to work.
18) That's the day of my appointment at the clap clinic.
19) I'm not allowed to cross the big road on my own.
20)There will be big boys there.
21) I'm only allowed to wear my party dress on Sunday.
22) There will be big girls there.
23) On Tuesdays I wear a dress, stockings and high heels and call myself Sally.
24) Tommy Murphy said I'm not allowed to play with you.
25) My wife won't let me.
Which one do you think he will choose? Let us know in the Shout box.
Thursday, 1 May 2008
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