Is This The Best Pub In Chester?

This is a picture of my friend and colleague Mr Mark Shaw standing outside The Plumbers Arms in Chester. After subjecting me to a whisky which reminded me of Parma Violets we decided to head outside so he could have a picture taken of this historic tavern. Now I have to be honest and tell you that this is the worst pub I have ever been in. This is an example of how my first and last drinks order went:

Me: Evenin love. A pint of Guinness please.

Barmaid: Sorry we don't have any.

Me(gutted):Oh right. A pint of bitter than please.

Barmaid: Sorry we don't have any bitter either.

Me(frustrated); You got any Magners?

Barmaid: I haven't got any of that either. We haven't had a delivery today.

So now I am lost for words and completely pissed off. No Guinness, Bitter or Magners WTF? But then by the grace of god in steps Mr Shaw who orders 2 Whiskeys(can't remember its name, something posh probably).

Me: Can I have Coke and Ice in mine please love?

Barmaid: Sorry we have no ice.

No ice, NO FUCKIN ICE??????????????? You gotta be kiddin me. Never in my life have I been in a pub that has NO FRIGGIN ICE. What the fuck caused them to have no ice. The water didn't turn up? I mean come on seriously NO ICE. Suffice to say I will never step foot in that dump ever again. The Plumbers Arms I salute your ineptitude.

Some Random Photos

Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Sport

So there I was talking crap to my Under Secretary and watching everyone bowl. When an almighty idea hit me. Here we all were bowling but I had no actual footage of it. So in a vain attempt to actually catch some footage of someone going flying flat on their arse, I set off with camera in hand. My victim Mr Carl Higgins. The result was not exactly what I had hoped for. But as you can see from the footage Higgins was a little bit pleased with himself.

Update: There is more footage but will it be uploaded? Mr Under Secretary its over to you.

The Usual Suspects

This is the first photo I have which includes most of the members of The Gentlemans Outing Association. As you can see from the picture on the right hand side we could be considered to be a bunch of ugly bastards. But I always look for inner beauty in people. Unfortunately on this occasion I find myself lost for words. Before anyone says anything and gets all annoyed I have not included myself in this photo because I was using my camera phone and it does not have a wide angle lens. This was our first attempt at a Ten Pin Bowling/Alcohol fueled/Chinese Meal day out. Which proved to be a very successful day indeed (I say this because I have heard no complaints and have just got off the phone to The Under Secretary) and I am pretty damn sure will be repeated again in the not to distant future.

Serious Dad

Remember when you were a kid and you played football with your dad at the local park? For many of us it was a fun and happy time. But I know a few lads that I was in school with that always came back with stories of pure terror. About how their dads would flatten them into the ground and make them go in goal and take penalties at them at about 100 miles an hour as if they were in a penalty shoot out in the World Cup finals. Unfortunately for some kids the above is still true today. But these days its not football but ten pin bowling. This guy to the right was out with his daughters (I will assume they were his daughters for the purpose of the story) who were between the ages of 5 to 15. The youngest was even using a ramp to launch the bowling ball. But that didn't stop serious dad grunting and groaning through every bowl he made. The look of pure disappointment on his face when he left any pins standing was priceless. My Under Secretary (Mr Mark Shaw) and Myself just had to get this guys photo so we could share it with you.

Sleeping Beauty: Part 2

The Sleeping Beauty of Blue Shift

Hello my name is Carl Higgins.